I've Been Doing A Lot of Thinking....

Ever came to a point where you're questioning everything that you're doing, whether it's really for you or it's something that you just ending up just because? 

Yeah, well... I'm at that point right now.

I've done a lot for this blog, but perhaps they're not enough. I love it, but I'm so close to quitting. I'm not entirely sure if blogging is for me. Somehow, I can help other pursue their blogging careers but I can't seem to do it for myself. I do it for my career, I do it for other brands (big and small), but when it comes to pursuing my personal brand, everything goes down the drain.

Quite ironic, huh? Pau Pursues Passion, the blog says. But the passion for what, really? 

I've tried and failed with my endeavors for the blog. I tried writing about personal branding but it feels so jibberish when I can't apply the tips on my own site. I can't bring myself to continue the blog series because it doesn't feel right. Maybe, in time, I can write about those things again -- when every single step is already proven and tested on this blog and not anyone else's. 

I used to write stories. Lots of it. None of those stories gained profit money-wise, but it gave me great joy -- even the ones that did not end up being read by anyone but me. Along the way, it faded just like that, too. I don't really know why but right now, as I write this, I feel the urge to rekindle it again. I also feel the urge to rekindle the spark I used to have for this blog but, I must admit, the spark is small and I'm still wondering what I can do to set it ablaze. 

Some days ago, I tweeted about coming to terms that blogging may not be for me. A friend kindly replied that blogging may not be, but writing definitely is. At the time, I simply "liked" her tweet because, much as I wanted to thank her for her kind words, I couldn't bring myself to accept it. 

Measurements for success in the world of blogging and writing is often in the form of likes and engagement. If you don't have a bunch of those, it can only mean two things: your work is not worth it or you're not spreading it enough. Either way, you're doing something wrong. In this case, I'm no longer sure where I lack. 

Hence, I've been doing a lot of thinking... and wondering if this blog should continue to remain up and accessible. And if it does, what should it contain?

I'm not sure anymore.

Part of pursuing passions, whatever that may be, is experiencing a hell lot of downs. I'm struggling to keep afloat right now but, despite and in spite of, I want to continue swimming my way through. 

Hopefully the next post will be a more positive one.

Thanks for bearing with me, if you've reached this point. :) 


Let me know what you think about this!